I held my raspberry tea gently in my hands and adored the way the warm mug felt against my skin early in the morning. I woke a little before 4am and had been meditating for over an hour.

I was deep in meditation and realized that I wasn’t getting many messages. I recognized that I started to reach for messages rather than surrendering to the process and allowing. I paused and asked myself why I was doing this.

We were walking and chatting about the shift that she had made. Months ago, she was apologetic about being a stay at home mom. Today, she wasn’t apologetic, she was ecstatic to be a stay at home mom. No part of her was minimizing it.

When I do listen, I am always amazed at the insight and clarity that I get from the experience. I always learn so much about myself and what that food or drink was doing to my body, heart, mind and spirit.

As I relaxed into this promise to myself I noticed that I found more inner peace. I wasn’t trying to control life, so I didn’t feel pressure.  I was simply present with the reality in front of me and responded to the flow or resistance that I felt.

I drifted slowly in and out of my physical body, playing with energy and allowing myself to begin to disconnect from my human body. I knew this sensation well as I had learned this during a meditation with a spirit shaman mentor. This playful energy drifting in and out of my body would eventually lead to disconnecting from my body and leaving the earthly plane to experience things not in this realm.

As I listened to her sobbing and telling me about her birth story, I realized that my intention had been met, even before the meditation started. There was still a part of me that was trying to show up like someone else. There was a part of me that didn’t feel good enough in the unique  way that I showed up as a healer. I have a different approach. That approach is divinely right from me because it is what naturally comes out of me, yet I was trying to shift or soften the way I showed up.

With each piece of wood that I added to the casket I thought about my ego and how it had gotten to what it is today. This came from a place of honesty and compassion. I wasn’t being judgemental about my ego, I was simply being real about it. With a lot of intention, the casket was made with the pieces of my ego

I will forever encourage people to express themselves openly and freely. No emotion is bad. No emotion is wrong. No emotion should be stuffed down into your body, mind, heart and soul to fester and stew. In holding onto emotions and trying desperately to deny them, we deny who we are and how we feel, we deny ourselves

Each week some statement that a client makes to me will “pop” for me. It will stand out as more present than other statements made throughout the week. I don’t chase or seek or look for these statements. I just notice them as they come through my reality and make themselves clearly known.