The water pushed hard against my body as I walked up stream in the river. As I moved each leg forward I could feel the resistance that the water was meeting me with. It was difficult to move one leg in front of another. Occasionally, the water would push me in one direction or another and I would lose my balance for just a moment, only to regain it a moment later. Even when I wasn’t trying to move forward I could feel the resistance pushing me in the other direction. I could feel the resistance of the water begging me to go the other way. I could feel the resistance of the water encouraging me to find another path. I could feel the resistance of the water trying to teach me about myself and simple laws of reality. I could feel the water rocking me back on my heels.

“Find flow” they say. Yet, here I was in the middle of flow and it still didn’t feel good. This wasn’t pressure and resistance that felt sustainable. I found the “flow” that everyone spoke about, yet it was relentless and trying to move me in another direction.

Then, one day, I turned around and realized that I didn’t have to try to walk upstream. In a split moment I realized that if I simply listened to the water and allowed it to be my medicine that it would hold me. I had to relinquish the human control that I was trying to exhibit. I had to turn around, lie back, remove my feet from the solid ground that I thought I wanted and allow the water to hold me. And just like that my body stopped fighting. I no longer felt resistance or pressure, I felt free and fluid as the water took me where I was meant to go. Rather than fighting the water I accepted its support and allowed it to hold me.

Whatever your river is, take a moment and realize where you feel resistance and then consider turning around, lying back, removing your feet from solid ground and allowing the river to hold you.