“Is everything ok? Why are you so cold? Did I do something wrong” she said.
The question and statement rocked me back on my heels. I was confused and honestly a little offended. I read the message over and over and felt my body respond with agitation.
I scrolled up and read my message to her, trying to understand why she was calling me cold. Originally, I was going to just answer her question that everything was fine and that she hadn’t done anything wrong but when I tried to type the response, I realized that it wasn’t in alignment. I needed to understand why she was saying that to me. Why had she interpreted my response to her as cold? It wasn’t in alignment to avoid the statement. So I asked her directly because I wasn’t interested in spending a bunch of time trying to guess or determine why she felt that I was cold. If she could explain to me why she felt I was being cold it would allow me to see myself more clearly because I don’t want to be cold in my responses to people.
“Why do you think that I am being cold?” I asked.
She went on to explain that I had just answered her, straight and to the point and I hadn’t included my normal niceties and that she was just double checking that she hadn’t done something wrong.
I read my message a couple of more times. I had simply answered her questions about where to find the content that she needed. I hadn’t met her with a bunch of niceties but I also hadn’t been cold and I knew that. I decided to let it go because I felt comfortable that I hadn’t actually been cold to her.
As the day progressed, I realized that I was still holding onto the comment. That it was bothering me and that I was in my head about it which made me realize that I needed to look at it more deeply. I stopped and sat in silence. When I allowed my body to release the tension it was holding around the interaction, I realized that she was projecting on me. I had given her some programs and a couple of sessions and when I really tuned into her, she felt guilty about receiving them. Her guilt, connected to feeling unworthy, was actually what she was responding to. That, I could understand. I have had years and years of my life where I didn’t feel worthy of receiving and would project that onto the people trying to give me something. While I didn’t know the exact spot that she was in, I knew my version of that spot and I knew that it wasn’t comfortable. Before I opened my eyes, I sent love to her heart. Then, I opened my eyes, released the interaction and moved about my day not letting it impact me again.