“I really think that you should consider giving him anxiety medication,” she said in a non-emotional tone as casually as she would if she were asking me what the weather was outside.
“Can you tell me more about that?” I asked.
“His anxiety is limiting him from being in his environment,” she said. “I think medication could change everything.”
“Well, I guess this is where we see the world differently. I think that his anxiety is simply him expressing that the environment isn’t right for him and doesn’t support the unique way that he moves through the world,” I said.
“He has missed a lot of school, and he has to go to school,” she responded.
I smiled gently at her, knowing that the conversation was done. She didn’t need to understand the way that I move through the world or the way that my son does. I understand him, and that’s enough; I don’t need her to. He picked me as his mum for a reason, and I am unafraid of the amazing human he is.
Months later, I was speaking with her again, and she asked about him.
“He is thriving,” I said.
She looked shocked. “Did he start medication?” she asked.
“Oh no, we changed environments. He hasn’t had an anxiety attack since we changed environments. He is getting an A+ in all of his classes. He is sleeping. He is laughing again. He is proud of himself and feels successful.”
“Wow, that is great,” she said with a hesitation in her voice that I interpreted as slight confusion.
I smiled at her gently. She didn’t need to understand, both he and I understood. He was never the issue. The only issue was finding the environment that allowed his authenticity, his uniqueness, and his genius to express themselves.
"Everybody is a genius, but if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid." Albert Einstein