“I am going out to chop some wood” he said as he picked up his water bottle.
“Ok baby, have fun” I responded.
It wasn’t until the next day that we spoke about why. I had spent much of the day crying and processing something difficult. I had someone say something to me that left me taking a really hard and long look at myself to see if any part of what this individual was saying was true. He had been the one who held me while I sobbed into his chest and arms. He was the one who stoked my hair and kissed my forehead. He held stability and protection for me while I was vulnerable and fell apart. I needed him to be “strong” so that I could be “weak”. I use those words because the english language doesn’t have the words that I want and that is the only way that I know how to express this in english. There is nothing weak about processing emotions, nothing. It is one of the strongest, most powerful, and impactful things that we can do as a human.
Nature told him to protect me because he loves me. Nature told him to fight for me. Years ago, he would have literally been fighting to protect me but in this day and age he is certainly not going to be in a physical fight for me yet his body and soul have a memory of that energy. His body needed to do something with that energy to allow it to move through him in a healthy way. He needed to express that “RAHHHHH, I am MAN” energy but needed a healthy outlet to allow it to come out of him. So, he chopped wood that would be burned in our fireplace to heat our home that winter. His ability to understand the energy moving through him, that he needed to move it from his system, and identify a healthy outlet to express that energy was absolutely beautiful to me. I was so wildly impressed and proud of him.
