We had limited time on this vacation and I didn’t want to waste a minute of our time. I wanted to have all of the fun. I wanted to enjoy all of the things. I wanted to do all of the adventures. I wanted to explore all of the places. I didn’t want to waste a second.
I had made plans to wake up early and get out on the ocean to watch the sunrise as we only have 2 mornings and the second morning we would be leaving shortly after sunrise. As we got ready for bed, I pulled out my phone and went to set the alarm clock but for some reason I simply couldn’t do it. I couldn’t turn on the alarm. I couldn’t schedule my wake up. I sat staring at my phone trying to decide if I would honor the resistance that I was feeling or my desire to make every second count.
I closed the app and didn’t set the alarm. I pulled the thick hotel blinds over the large windows and crawled into bed. The next morning when I rolled over and it was almost 7 I felt shocked. My body normally woke me by 5 even if an alarm didn’t. I was lying on my left side looking at the clock on the bed stand. How could it be almost 7? How did my body sleep this late?
I lay there silently wondering if my husband was still sleeping and listened for the sound of his breathing. If he was still asleep I didn’t want to roll around and wake him. As I lay there listening, I noticed that my eyes were still locked on the clock.
Part of me wondered if I had wasted my trip. Part of me thought that I had wasted my time and was somehow missing out. I was missing fun. I was missing an adventure. I was missing something that would have brought me joy.
How ridiculous, I thought to myself as I observed my own thought patterns. Another story, and a better story, is that I honored what I needed. I listened to my body and it clearly needed rest. I got the sleep that I needed to make the rest of the day more enjoyable. I hadn’t wasted anything, rest is just as important as doing. In fact, without proper rest I can’t accomplish and enjoy adventures.
Then, I closed my eyes again and drifted into meditation where I explored my relationship with rest and the divine feminine.