“Why do you drive rather than fly to the workshop?” he asked.

“Well, it is part of the adventure. It is part of the experience. The drive down to the workshops allows me time and space to be prepared emotionally and mentally and it allows me time to speak openly and freely with my partner. On the ride home we get to process and integrate what we learned in the workshop.” I responded.

“Yeah, but it takes the whole day.” he said.

“Yeah, but what would be a better way to spend the day?” I asked.

I allowed for silence. 

“You see, life is way too fast these days. We all are in a hurry to get somewhere, not sure where we think we are going, but we are definitely in a rush. This gives me process time which is really important. I could fly down and fly back but I would feel rushed and I would enter back into activities before I had the real opportunity to be alone with myself and to feel everything fully and speak through it with my partner. I would love to say that if I flew that I would still take the day to myself but the reality is that I wouldn’t and I know that. This is a way to ensure that I take the time for myself that I truly need.”

“Ok” he said back with a question in his voice.

“It doesn’t have to be right for anyone but me.” I said. “I know myself pretty deeply and I know what things I need to put in place to support myself and this is just one of them. I smiled back at him. I truly didn’t need him to understand or agree with me, I didn’t need that validation, I knew what worked for me and this worked for me.