“I need something” I said as I walked through the kitchen opening cabinets and doors only to realize that there was nothing there that I wanted.

He laughed at me. “Did you want me to make you a grilled cheese and tomato or tea?”

“No, thank you though” I said back. I kept walking around the house searching but not finding what I was looking for.

A couple of hours and a couple of clients later I came back into the kitchen. “I need something” I said with a whine in my voice. I knew that I didn’t want food or drink but I also knew that I needed something.

He laughed again and hugged me. As I rested my head on his chest and he rubbed my back and kissed my forehead, I allowed my eyes to close. The moment that my eyes closed it became clear what I needed. I wasn’t getting enough down time. I wasn’t getting enough meditation. I wasn’t getting enough time in spirit. To be clear, I was getting all of those things but I wasn’t getting ENOUGH of them. I needed more. I could spend time judging why I needed more or I could accept and honor that I simply needed more. I rubbed my face across his chest and smelled him while keeping my eyes gently closed. I had identified what I needed. I needed to give myself rest and time. I knew that if I ignored this need that I would feed this need differently. I would reach for food or stimulation of another form. I also knew that I didn’t have time to go sit in meditation because I had another client coming soon. So, I did the next best thing, I took advantage of the time that I had, pressed against his chest feeling loved and supported, I took deep breaths and honored what I truly needed and then made the conscious decision that I would carve out more meditation time before bed. Learning to rest between moments of production has been life changing for me and allows for far more rest in my reality than I would otherwise be getting.