My dryer died. It wasn’t a surprise, it was old and it didn’t owe me anything. I purchased a new dryer and was happy with my purchase for the first couple of months. 

Then, slowly, my dryer stopped working well. I would check it and the clothes would still be damp, so I would run it a second time. I started washing smaller loads of laundry thinking that this was the issue. Eventually, it got to the point where each load needed to be dried twice. I checked all of the settings and cleaned out things. I tried to be responsible and do my part of determining why the dryer wasn’t working. Over time, I got defeated and decided that I simply purchased the wrong dryer and relaxed into double drying of all loads of laundry. I accepted it for what it was after trying to change the situation without success. 

Then, one day my washer became more and more loud. I thought to myself, I must be overloading it again. Days later, it became clear that the washer was dead. I purchased a new one which was delivered almost immediately. I did a couple loads of laundry and noticed something…… the dryer worked again. I didn’t need to put the clothes through the dryer twice anymore. The whole time I had been blaming the dryer when in fact  there was nothing wrong with the dryer at all. I had jumped through hoops trying to get the dryer to function better, only to realize that the dryer was perfectly fine and the issue was that the washer wasn’t doing its part of co-creating clean laundry. 

Have you ever been my dryer? Have you ever thought that there was something wrong with you, only to realize later that you were trying to make something inside of you change and work better, but the issue is that the washer wasn’t doing its part? 

I am a huge believer in taking responsibility for your reality which includes knowing when you are working with another half that isn’t compatible.